Marriage – A Parable

There is a woman, married to a man she loved. At the beginning, her marriage was all about a shared love—the two of them sharing hearts and visions and learning to become one. Now, her marriage is more like a business. She manages their home and children, prepares meals, and performs a host of other responsibilities, all for the love of her family. 

Her best friend once told her that she had forgotten what marriage was about, that she had forsaken her first love, the love for her husband. The friend got an earful in reply. “Look at all the stuff I do for my family!” the woman replied, and then described her many self-sacrifices—all done for her husband and family. “Is this not proof of my love?!” She dared her friend to suggest otherwise.

What she doesn’t see is that her husband has become another duty on her checklist. The covenant of shared-love has become an enterprise of managed-activity. She entered into her marriage covenant thinking its purpose was to make them one, and by that bond it would create the environment from which many things would be born—children, ministry, service to God and others. But she now lives as if her covenant was just the means of birthing these many things. Such things have now become the point, not the byproduct. Marriage is less about her husband and more about her household. 

This is the way it’s supposed to be, right? she asks herself. Something deep inside her wonders if he married her just so she could manage all these things for him. That must be true, she thinks, because look at me now—this is the situation.

She married for love, but has now lost her way. Once focused on the man she loved, her heart is now captured by her many activities. She has become a Martha.

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Jesus didn’t come to earth to get workers for his kingdom. He came to get a bride.

Let us rejoice and exalt him and give him glory, because the wedding celebration of the Lamb has come. And his bride has made herself ready. Revelation 19:7

… And to confirm this promise, he has given us the Holy Spirit, like an engagement ring, as a guarantee. 2 Corinthians 5:5 (TPT) The Greek word for “down payment” (or “pledge”) is arrabōn and is used in Greek culture for “engagement ring.”